Now that G has developed skills, and the ability to connect them together logically and with purpose to perform great deeds and feats, her gaping amoral void yawns before us, and we must fill it or suffer dire consequences!

In almost as little time as it took her to render our house unfit for living, she moved a stepstool up to the exact spot on the counter above-which sat an icing-covered brownie and proceeded to harvest great troughs of sweets for herself. Over and over again. I’d go check my email and come back to see a scene from Hersheypark gone awry. This is just an example, only seemingly more graphic because there is chocolate involved.

She extracts herself seemlessly from the carseat, only to run across the parking lot.

She selflessly tries to mop up her own spills, knocking over plateware while she wields a broom twice as tall as herself.

She puts on her own clothes and gets stuck, she takes off her own clothes and gets stuck, she climbs through the dog-door and gets stuck, she notices the cat getting stuck in the travel cage on the way to the vet and wants to help cause “Turtle stuck, daddy!”

The innocence with which she filthifies and terrifies me makes it clear that i can stop holding her upside down and looking for 666 beneath her hair. more that she can now put moves together and wherever a third or a fourth move is ambiguous she will extemporize or panic. Sometimes it is good and evil, sometimes it is beyond good and evil and simply her will to power.

She has no fear of new dogs if they are moving slow, and goes up and pets them correctly, leaving an actual evaluaton of their personalities to me. She shows up to daycare and a procession of children toddle by and give her a hug and they all greet eachother by name, leaving an actual evaluation of how snotty they are to me. She has finally grasped the vague and fuzzy concept of garbage, sorta, thus that we are pretty sure she threw out Beckie’s cell phone. With great power comes great respoinsibility. I cannot allow her to carry a plate of food and storm across the house and into any bed that feels comfortable at the moment. Society needs rules!! The alternative – anarchy!