One of the things they teach you in lifeguard school is the last thing you do is go in the water after a victim — strive to preserve your safety first.   Its like putting the mask on your face before the kid;s face just before the airplane crashes into a government building.   The Red Cross has a phrase to describe safe lifeguarding: reach, throw, go.   They have other catchphrases, and as you are struggling to breath and carry stuff during search &   rescue lessons and ensure that you will make $1.50 above minimum wage next summer, you realize the book-smart taint on some of the instruction.   When confronted with a victim step 1 is ask them if they are ok. Scenarios in the tests go like this: a man is lying face down in a pool of his own blood.   his spine is ticking through ihs lung.   What do you do? The correct answer begins by inquiring, “Are you ok?”

Suck, tuck, and duck is another such gem of brilliance.   When you are making a water rescue, and a panicked victim turns on you in a desperate quest to get above water, suck a breath of air, tuck your chin, and duck underwater.   Its the most important thing you get graded on during the hand-to-hand water combat tests, as the instructors come at you like hungry zombies or screaming tweener Jonas Brother fans: suck, tuck and duck.

Whoever came up with this never met Genevieve. Genevieve doesn’t care about staying above the water, she is going to make a play. Like a water polo player, she has realized underwater is part of the game.

My neck is the most vulnerable, it makes a great hold, better than an arm cause you cant slip or get shaken off, and it often leads to rides on the back or launches across the pool. I fear for my neck, its something that would actually put me in real danger in the pool.

Another defensive technique is getting to the bottom of the pool away from her swinging feet. If you look at G, she is not a thin girl. Like her mom, and her daddy, she has strong humunculous quads, propelling size 9.5 T bricks at my skull.

She learns more every week how to swim underwater and use her body right. She goes under and reacts and surfaces ready and willing to kick your ass. She lovez the pool. We need a lifeguard, or a better buddy-system.