…of my tiny life ago, this shirt was perfectly clean.

somewhere in the very recent past, that monkey from Baby Einstein gave way to Dora the Explorer. and i have been praying to the non-existent god for his mercy ever since. i hate it, i seriously seriously hate it. Baby Einstein was awesome, like watching fish to soothing music. just today in the gym i spaced out on the elliptical for like 20 minutes with Animal Planet on the tv. except that i had a much more Squizz\Ethel\The Joint soundtrack. and there were sharks eating baby alligators, and salmon hurling themselves against rocks and then having their corpses eaten by the cast of Baby Einstein.

but this Dora shit has just enough plot to be un-ignorable, but it does things over and over again, and its soooooooooo slow…so slow a 2 year old could figure it out. its like the anti-Bourne trilogy, with annoying voices. i’m going to kill myself.

what makes it all even worse is that G is demanding to watch it non-stop. its seriously making me feel inadequate in that i can not compete. realistically, however, i get bored shitless entertaining G non-stop, cause…cause she does the same 3 things over and over again.   Dora is a perfect match.

A sampling of her conversation, while i write:

“beach! park! my mommy. wanna go home. wanna go school. ah beach! wanna go beach. daddy! <some babbling> whatsat? wanna go beach. ooh my mommy. whodat? i wann go beach.”

beckie let’s G watch a lot at night, and by then its often too exhausting to try to keep up with her.   So we certainly have fed her obsessions. But the more i think about it, the more i’m convinced G’s been a tv addict all along.   it didn’t seem so bad when it was Baby Einstein and mostly just eye candy, but even then it was like heroin for her. She did not learn to like tv, its simply a compulsion to watch, and what is a tinyHuman to do?   Makes you realize what a truly evil device the tube can be.